Truth or dare

The waiting room was full of children waiting for vaccinations. All of them wanted to know the same thing: "Will it hurt?" Most parents replied: "No, it won't." But one family was different. When Michael Leviton asked his mother, she said: "Yes, it will".  Michael was thrilled. He liked having parents who he could trust. Everyone else's lied to them. 

But as he grew older, he realised being totally truthful had disadvantagesWeaknesses, shortcomings. . Finally, aged 29, he taught himself to lie. 

Leviton's parents never set honesty as a household rule. But they led by example. Michael followed.  At school, he was proud of being truthful. He talked about his feelings. He challenged anyone who braggedBoasted. Someone who boasts a lot is known as a braggart. about things they had not actually done. As a teenager, he tried to convince other people to be more like him.

But he soon hit problems. He failed job interviews because he was so open about his weaknesses. He struggled with girlfriends because his honesty was too harsh. 

Finally, he fell in love with someone happy to approach life in the same way. "We talked constantly, sharing our most bizarreWeird. It comes from the Italian word bizzarro, meaning angry. feelings, observations and opinions." But the relationship was too intense. It ended in heartbreak. That was the moment Michael decided to change. He taught himself to lie. 

And it was a success. He felt his life improving. He got piano playing gigsA live show, usually used to describe a concert given by a band.  by not admitting he could not play very well. Job interviews went better. 

Soon, Leviton realised that truth was about deep trust. He saved his honesty for close friends. In return, they did the same for him. 

Is honesty overrated?

Yes: To get on with other people, we have to tell small untruths to spare their feelings. Honesty is a virtue, but kindness is a more important one. Nobody wants to be told that their new shoes look ridiculous, or that you will not come to their party because you think it will be boring.

No: A successful society is built on trust. Many of the world's greatest political problems stem from the fact that voters do not believe what their leaders tell them.

Or... It depends on the lies. White lies can be just as important for helping members of society get along. But being dishonest for one's own gain is a different kind of dishonesty - the kind that can ruin governments, societies and countries.